I feel alone

I don't have a ton of time this morning before I need to leave for work, but I know that I needed to write something here to begin my day well.  There is something very valuable about a righteous routine, especially when you are dealing with addictions and SSA. 

In the past two months, I have made some new friends that have helped me tremendously in my struggles.  They are people to which I can look  for council, help, and most importantly friendship.  I struggle with SSA because male to male interactions are very important in dealing with your struggles.  I need those male to male interactions, and although I am unsure why I need them.  I know that I do. 

In my mind, I make up stories about me and my best friend.  The life that we will have...and then reality sets in.  The gospel tells me that I must marry and have a best friend in my wife.  My feelings tell me that I want a best friend as a male.  Someone that understands me completely.  and then I am torn up inside because I know that I will never truly have the latter as I imagine it.

I love my life, and I love the people in it.  Sometimes like today when I feel alone, I wish I could have a best friend that loves me as much as I love him.